ONE MONTH

FIRST - a quick recap of the Diabolical Double: Read my awesome training partners recaps of their days here and here. And then imagine of the exact opposite (as well as the exact opposite of my experience last year) - and that was my day. In a nutshell, at the second rest stop (about mile 40?) I made the wise decision to let my girls go ahead, do what was best for me on that day and drop down to the 102 mile route. I'm also VERY proud that I do not consider this a failure and was able to turn around one of the most challenging mental and physical days I've had on the bike in the last 14 miles.  Some days you just don't have 'it' and sadly, from the start, it was clear my 'it' did not show up to ride 125 miles and climb 16,000 feet.

HOWEVER - In general, things are moving along. Today marks ONE MONTH exactly to Placid. The past three week block has help my confidence about where I am and where I may be come race day, but I just got my schedule through the race and I realize I still have A LOT of work ahead of me, which is a good thing.

This year's approach has been very different than last year's build. Last year was all about crossing the finish line happy and healthy. This year - these things are still at the top of my goal list, but my coach has designed a program that will allow me to approach my pacing race day a bit more aggressively, if I choose to do so. I am still a bit uncertain how it will all play out, but as the weeks progress, I am a bit more confident in my current fitness and abilities.

However, a different approach makes it impossible to compare last year vs. this year, which as a type A athlete, is frustrating and freeing at the same time. I can't compare the number of rides over 6 hours I did last year vs. this year, because the structure is totally different. My rides may be shorter, but they are at a higher heart rate with specific goals built in. I can't compare my long runs and I realized yesterday I DEFINITELY cannot compare my taper period. This year will be 10 days of HARD work then 10 days of gradual rest going into the race. This means a long run much closer to the race than last year, and a longer ride the weekend prior to the race. It's scary, and I know that my taper could be hit or miss. But I've accepted it and mapped out my way to July 28th.

One of my goals for this training cycle was to let go a bit of the 'data' side of things. I am only keeping 1 very loose training log  and hardly recording paces - just notes on how things 'felt'. I looked today and I haven't downloaded any data off my Garmin since November last year.  I have only be using it to guide me through track work and monitor my HR on long rides. This approach has helped me get through the weeks, especially as I get more and more broken down. I can't stress about my pace this week vs. my pace two weeks ago on a 2 hour run, because I haven't been looking.

All this to say - the work is getting done, I am feeling MUCH better about my fitness than I was a month ago, but in all honestly I still have no idea what will come on race day, but I am 100% more excited than I was a month ago.

Emptying your mind.

I think one major advantage that comes with years and years of swimming is the ability to completely clear my mind. In order to get through a long set, a hard set, the pain of a workout, you need the ability to disconnect your body from your mind. Your mind telling you that it hurts, that it's bored, and it can't do one.more.lap.

After taking a break from regular swimming (read: since Ironman), it always takes awhile for this disconnect to return. But when it does, it's heaven. I was having trouble getting past the 2000 yard mark in workouts. My body was willing my mind was not.  My brain just wouldn't shut off. But I found that sweet spot during a set of 400s last week and it makes all the difference. Turn your brain off, find your pace, and just SWIM.

Sadly, this ability does not always translate to the bike and the run. It takes longer to find that space, and it occurs much less frequently. Sometimes an hour or two ride can seem ENDLESS because I just can't turn off my mind, and same with a hard interval run, or an easy long run. Especially with the run, I have had trouble turning my brain off. After 1 mile of a long run a few weekends ago, all I could think is 'I have HOW MANY more miles left?!'

But over the past week or so, the shift is slowly happening. Maybe it's the return of higher training hours, more focus, or the melting away of other-life stress, but I have been able to zone out and just get the work done, and it's GLORIOUS. 4 solo, hilly hours on the bike flew by on Sunday, and I couldn't wipe the silly grin off my face. At one point, while going 4mph climbing Mt. Weather, I was singing 'Eternal Flame' by the Bangles (RIP) aloud (LOUDLY) and realized, this is also a song I sing when swimming. Strange.

Then Tuesday, finally, FINALLY, I was able to clear my mind and just enjoy a long run. 10 minutes run, 1 minute walk, up and down hills, I was able to zone out for 1:50 and felt fresh at the end. And it made me SO HAPPY. I remembered how great the IM marathon felt and for the first time in awhile, I thought I could put together another happy IM marathon.

Slowly, but surely, I am remembering how much I loved IM training last summer. I'm remembering that  time and  pace and place don't matter, that I truly just love to be out there, and I know that I will be ready to do it again in 8 weeks.
 

Updates.

All the uproar about Google Reader going 'away' made me remember I had a blog. For the record, I don't think Google Reader is going away...I think they will introduce something else.

Things have been quiet. In the history of my history, quiet means things are GOOD and there is no need to talk about them, or something is really BAD and writing it down means it's real so I avoid writing about it. Currently, I feel like I'm in a constant state of IN BETWEEN.

First the bad. I took February basically off of running. I have drafts saved in blogger about how 'YAY YAY January was my highest mileage month in years and I FEEL SO GOOD and I want to PR and go 1:3:x:xx in March and I am confident' Then February started and I was on an easy run and I had sharp pain in my foot that wouldn't really go away. X rays were taken and very.bad.things were ruled out, and the advice to take '4-6 week of rest' simply made me laugh. So I decided to take 2 weeks off. Focus on biking. Find my swim mojo (still searching for that...). I was dreading the time off. I had finally found my love of running and love running high miles. The week I go above 30 miles, I drop 3-5 pounds, it's like magic. Awesome magic. But the truth is, and I have learned the hard way over and over again, my body just can't take high mileage.

Part of the reason I hired a coach for IM was to save me from myself. I know I don't know when to say when. I also know, and have the MRIs and Xrays and scar tissue in my hip to prove it, that I also often choose to ignore aches and pains and push through majorly serious injuries and I have been conditioned by years of swimming to try to 'ice away' aches and pains. So my coach saved me last year. He showed me that I can be successful and happy at the end of the day running 20-30 mile weeks. That a marathon is possible on a long run of 16 miles. That success and happiness, FOR ME, for an Ironman equals lots and lots of hours in the saddle and no junk running miles and one FULL real rest day every week.

But I decided to focus on running this winter. Without a coach. and BAM, I went from the HIGHEST mileage month in years to the LEAST miles in years.

But surprisingly  for 14 days - I didn't miss running. Biking feels great. And I'm slowly and smartly (with the help of coach) adding back in my miles with no rush. I had some awesome tempo miles tonight that had my mind wandering to visions of still trying to race this weekend. Silly, silly Sarah. I will be on my bike, staying far, far away from any running races.

Another reason I didn't miss running? I was busy. You know how they* say that starting a new job and buying a house are two of the top 5 major life stresss? (*They...you know...THEY).  Well I decided to do both in a three month span, on top of trying to train for an Ironman and deal with an injury.

So needless to say, my head is NOT in the game right now when it come to training. I'm going through the motions and getting most of the work done (not in the pool), but I honestly am a bit freaked out by the idea that I'm doing an Ironman in a few months. I know it will all come around. We will move and things will settle down and I can just focus. And it will get warm and I can swim outside and I will be fine.

But right now. I just feel so IN BETWEEN. I'm so so happy about the house. We close in two weeks. But I'm stressed beyond belief. About stupid non-issues (couches and paint) and real life issues like being booked to travel 15 out of 20 work days in April.

I just want to take a deep breath, exhale and have it be May. Warm, race season, with long training weekends on the horizon. Oh, and probably another 15 days on the road.

Back at it!

I'm officially back on schedule with my coach. There are other small goals along the way, but my main focus this year is Placid. But with a (FINGERS CROSSED!) potential move in the cards, which would bring a new commute, as well as my new work schedule, the plan is to race a bit less this year. A few races are on the schedule to dust off the cobwebs, but the only thing set in stone is an early season olympic.

I was (I AM!) excited to get back on schedule. I had a great talk with coach last week, and waited in anticipation for my schedule to start February 1st. However, when I finally got the email with my daily workouts through February 20th I had a minor freakout. My running is staying the focus through mid-March, and I'm slowly adding in 3x bikes and 2-3x swims per week. I wasn't overwhelmed by the volume, and was excited to see the VO2 max running intervals and race-pace miles. But I just wasn't that excited about the rest of it.

So the plan for the next three weeks: Make a valid attempt at each workout. If I'm not feeling it - calling it quits isn't failing. But I need to at least make the attempt. Once I'm on the trainer - banging out 55 minutes of strength really isn't so bad. The worst part of swimming is simply getting in the damn water - once you're in, what's the difference between 1500 and 3000 yards?

Another change I am making this year (and I spent A LOT of time thinking about this on my long run this morning to take my mind off my frozen fingers and painfully cold ears) is focusing on getting the work DONE in the moment and not overanalyzing the data afterwards. In the past, I have been tedious about logging my workouts, writing down my paces and heart rate and exact mileage and comparing workouts and looking at my progress. I think it has served me well in the past, but I learned a lot about myself as an athlete last year, and I think one of my main takeaways when it came down to my confidence going into Ironman was to just get the damn work done and then move on.

The last change (for now) - no more Training Peaks. It's not a tool my coach uses - however last summer I continued to log my hours just so I could see my Monday-Sunday totals. But now that I've been through an ironman training block with my coach I have learned - when you work with a coach that creates a schedule in 10 or 12 day blocks, total hours per week means absolutely nothing. All it did was let me compare myself to what everyone else was doing - and in the end, it's only about what I'm doing to get me to the start of the race happy and healthy.

Catching up.

My life has basically consisted for the following routine since I returned from camp:

sleep-bike-visit boy-work-run-swim-eat salad-coach-sleep-talk to boy-visit boy-sleep-bike-work-coach-work-sleep-bike-bike-run-swim

I can hardly complain and I have had a nice break from traveling for my job to allow me to focus on getting the training in and prepare for a great season. I am super excited to see what the season holds, and the first test is up next weekend in Knoxville at the Rev3 OLY race. My teammates had a fabulous and successful weekend down in St. Anthony's, and while I was a bit jealous I didn't kick my season off down there (and attend the ensuing celebration post-race), I think getting two more weeks of training under my belt will be best in the long run.

I will be using Eagleman as a 'long training day' - it will be my first HIM and I'm still having a bit of trouble figuring out nutrition, but I am allowing the possibility of an unexpectedly great day. The main goal is Syracuse 70.3 in September, allowing me the entire summer to get the biking and running miles under my belt. Between now and then, however, work travel will ramp up again, so I will need to find a balance - and some running routes in Zambia.

While being dead tired and a walking zombie may hinder my social life, it does allow for my favorite pass-time:

online shoe shopping!

I'm a sucker for the wedge. Even more so for $25 comfortable wedges.

Hello, my pretties, please don't give me blisters in Knoxville.

These will be on my feet 93.4% of the summer, well, at least, the 93.4% of the time that I'm not wearing bike shoes or running shoes.